It’s impossible to know how you’ll make it through – sometimes, it’s impossible to know if you will ever see the day of stability in both your child and yourself. If I can offer any advice, any at all – based on this experience – open a line of communication. A friend once told me to always keep photos of our family in our home, but to remember the photo in the center should be of Me and Nikki – the foundation of our family.
Finding stability with McKenzie’s health (even if it was short-lived) prompted me to step back and focus on our home – At times, it’s been hard to maintain a healthy lifestyle, marriage and home while attending never ending appointments, hospitalizations and various medical requirements.
Our days have been full of traveling hours to children hospitals for McKenzie, or working morning to evening to provide for the family. Our nights are exhausting and our bodies have become nothing more than silent, moving shells. Our animals have started acting out – they simply don’t understand the chaos. Our home has been in crumbles with hospital bags, paperwork and misc. stuff spread throughout. The last nine months have taken their toll – in which has left us in a place of uncertainty as we struggle to find our stability.
As we started to complain about the things that could have gone different, the things that could have been better – we stopped and remembered the journey we’ve walked to get here – to have the stability of McKenzie’s health in order to focus on other aspects of life. We would be foolish to think these moments were in vein. During the process of becoming self-aware of the impact our daughters health has taken on other aspects of our lives, we learned a valuable skill; communication. We have learned a lot through Our Journey, we are now learning life-coping skills and understanding it’s ok to feel overwhelmed, We are growing – we are growing as individuals, as partners, and as special needs parents.